Monday, March 30, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Anyway, I am in the middle of a two week vacation. So far, I went to Vegas as the big part of my time off, and now I am enjoying the little things about NOT being at work. Like Monday when I did not set my alarm and slept until 11am. (I did, however, wake up in the middle of the night with a coughing fit because I have been sick. Yes, I got sick on my vacation. LAME.) Like today when I got out of bed to get a massage. I seriously need to relax more...I was asked if I ate rocks for breakfast! I have been prescribed marshmellows and icyhot. I wish I had the ability to get a massage every week. I think I could benefit HIGHLY from it. Haha, so would my masseuse! I get to hang out with an array of new and old friends over the next few days, and in between I am going to polish off season 4 of 24. I really like 24. It is very addictive...and a fun diversion.
As I said in an earlier blog, I have been going through a lot of change...God is wiping my slate clean and is faithfully adding new things to my plate. I am trying to be like Elisha when he asked for a double portion of what Elijah had. He asked for it, he received it, and then he walked it out. God is blessing me in ways I could not have planned or designed myself, and I know He is beginning to show me how He is going to bring new life to old promises. I am receiving. I am excited, and I am letting Him lead. I have tried leading my whole life, and it has not gotten me very far. This vacation has been timely. I needed to rest, and process. But it is also giving me a chance to spend some time with people I may not have been able to nail down with my regular schedule. God has given me some appointments and I am looking forward to seeing what He is going to do with it all.
I know I will be a little sad when I have to go back to work, but I am grateful that I have gotten a chance to have a little fun and relaxation. And I will have made a real dent in my vacation hours! I was almost maxed out! Got to go back to work so I can earn more, I guess! But lesson learned: take more vacation. It is good for you!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
I arrived in Las Vegas less than twenty four hours ago, and if it weren't for the two people I am here to visit, I would be ready to drive right on back to my beautiful home in SLO. I really don't like Vegas. It is HUGE. The regular streets have more lanes than the "freeway" I have back home. I took my brother to Cost-Co today to bless him with some food. It took us, no joke, 40 minutes to get there, and we were still in Vegas! Granted, some of it was due to traffic, but seriously? I saw like 5 Target Stores between his house and Cost-Co though. Haha.
I tried looking online last night to see if there were any good, affordable shows that I could take my brother to. More than half of the shows contain nudity (which I think is completely unnecessary), and then the rest are at least $60 per ticket! I am sure there is a way around this craziness, but after 15 minutes of trying to figure something out, I said never mind. And I can't even handle what the world can get away with posting on billboards here. I could go on and on.
The reason I am even blogging right now and not spending quality time with those two people I love is because my brother had to go to work for three hours, and my high school bff is also at work. So I am left to entertain myself. So, Vegas.
I may end up doing kareoke tomorrow night or something funny like that. Today, I went shopping with/for my brother. And we watched Flywheel. Tomorrow, I am going to leave myself in the hands of Vegas experts while avoiding eye contact with dodgy billboards and flashy signs.
I am definitely a small town girl.
What I have realized though, is that Vegas is just another city...it just keeps going and going and going. And because it is bigger, it has a lot more of the problems my town has, not different, just more. Sure, it has gambling to throw into the mix, but the people have the same issues as we do back home. It is just multiplied. I feel overwhelmed in big cities like this one, as though I could not make a difference here. The truth is I can't. But God can. And that is all that really matters. So, I miss home, but I am glad to be here. It is good to be with people I love.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back,
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
This is one of my favorite poems ever, and I feel like it has applied to my life so many times! I am at a sort of crossroads right now, where my life is full of change. And I can choose the road I have worn down with many footsteps, the one where I walk in my own strength...or I can choose the path less traveled. The one led by God. Only one path truly makes the difference. I know the answer, but often I find myself trying to look back, wondering if my way would have been the best.
It never is, and I realize that.
This word alone makes me cringe, unless it is MY idea. Haha, funny thing is, it is almost never my idea. I have recently been thrown into change that has thrown my emotions into upheaval and left me wondering what the heck I am supposed to do.
So, for probably the first time REALLY in my life, I have given it all to God. I pretty much told Him that I could not handle it or figure out all of the answers and placed it all in His hands. You know what He did? He moved, He spoke to me, He led me, and He comforted me. He gave me answers when I felt helpless, and He revealed to me much of what He had done ahead of time to prepare for the change. It didn't mean I didn't cry almost everyday of the last 8 or so days. It didn't mean I felt like everything was under control. But I did have peace in knowing God was in control. I don't have to be in control for things to be under control. It is a freeing feeling.
There is much going on inside of me and around me...but I am looking to the future. I believe that God is beginning to clear the way for Him to be able to bring the promises He has spoken. And sometimes the clearing away is painful. In the end, it is all worth it. The letting go, the dying to what we cling to...it all amounts to a greater result than we could have ever got our hands onto. So, I am looking to the promises written in the stars, I am looking forward. And I am looking forward to the results.