Monday, July 18, 2011

running

I was once overheard saying that the only way to get me to run was by chasing me from behind with a knife. I think I was traumatized by the "Friday Fun Run" in high school and I never looked back. It was NOT fun. But I found myself trying to figure out how to lose weight, and not ever quite getting there. And then my brother posted this video.



I thought to myself, "If this man could do it, so can I." So, I looked up ways to ease into running. I found the Couch to 5k program. It is now week 3. It's amazing how sometimes it is quite easy. It's like my body is celebrating the fact that I am making it do things it is not used to doing. And other days it's harder, and I have to press through to finish what I started. I have started out with walking and jogging. Each week adds a new challenge, and it seems that even though it gets harder, I am ready for it when it comes. I am most proud that I have stuck to this. I can't say that I like running. But I don't hate it. In fact, it is teaching me about pushing through and persevering in a very practical way.

It's funny to me that the pounds aren't just melting off...in fact, sometimes I feel like I am gaining weight. However, my body is changing, firming up, slimming down. I am excited to see this through. In the past, I have not wanted to say out loud what I want to accomplish for fear of not following through. But I can't waste time worrying about that.

Instead, I am taking the one two approach and hitting it hard by re-joining weight watchers at the same time. There is a fight within me that wants to get there. To lose the weight I need to be healthy.

There are a lot of fears...and of course, they are irrational. Fear of failing. Fear of accomplishing and what that would mean for my life. Fear that I'd get there and then somehow end up back where I started...which would almost be worse than failing in the first place. I am looking fear in the face and moving...jogging forward.

As I meet some markers, I'll share. But really so far I consider it a great accomplishment to have not only started it and not missed a day, but to have taken being active much more seriously in the last 4 months. I know it will pay off.

2 comments:

Emily said...

I know it'll pay off too! I think it's great you're doing the couch to 5k, and I'm sure you're going to rock it.

I hope weight watchers gets you to where you want to be. :)

Way to go!

k said...

you are awesome!! and inspiring!! it's really hard work, i know this. as a runner who hasn't run in two months, i'm dreading starting again and getting back in to the habit because i know what a struggle it can be. but it's so worth it!